Matt and I will be visiting Seattle this week. For the first time I am actually getting excited to visit the city where Matt and I will be starting our married life. That may be surprising, but I have been very worried about our pending move. I have so many thoughts that always are running through my head about moving. Most of the time, I let fear take over, but I have really been trying to be excited about what is in our future. I will never know what God has planned for my life if I don't experience new things. While I would love to stay in Durango for a long time, I also know that it is time for us to go. I may find that I love living near both the water and the mountains. So, this is it, we will go and check it out. Seattle is going to become real for me and I will be able to picture our future life there. Wish me luck!!
Archive for March, 2006
For some reason today was a very emotional day. It seemed that everything I did, read, or heard was upseting to me. Teaching my students today did not go as well as I always hoped it will, but that passes. While taking a break, I was reading through some news stories and ran across this Kevin Sites in the Hot Zone article on Yahoo! news about a young girl in Afganistan. She suffered tremendious pain and hurt from the time she was 4 years old to her current age of 11. I was in tears after reading her plight and was fustrated why a loving God could let such a horrible thing happen to this young child. It was almost too painful to continue reading her story, but I am glad I finished the article. This little girl's outlook on life is amazing. While I was questioning God, she was thankful for God in her life. This quote shows some of her grace-led faith,
"As we walk outside to take some pictures, I ask her if, after all she's been through, she thinks it will be harder to trust, to believe that there are actually good people in the world.
"No," she says, quickly.
"I didn't expect anyone would help me but God. I was really surprised that there were also nice people: the neighbor, the rickshaw driver, the police," she says. "I pray for those who helped release me."
Wow, this really blew me away. For a girl who had been through some of the worst human suffering to have this outlook on life, well, it simply amazes me.
I beleive there are times in everyone's lives where they become fustrated with the people who are around them. As Matt and I are nearing the end of our time in Durango, a place filled with so many of our memories, I am struggling being able to come to terms with some people who are close to me, and us. I have realized as I struggle with this, it takes a great deal of patience and positive thinking on my part. However, no matter how many times I literally force myself to hold back angry words from people I love, or once loved, I find myself thinking there was once more than anger/annoyance here. I think that every person has, or will, find themselves in this situation. A time when you outgrow friendships and relationships. The thought that has kept me sane during these times is that at one point we have relationships with certain people for a reason. While someone may only grace your life for a season, I think they serve some purpose. So, when I find myself getting upset or down about the people around me I try to remember that and how many good times, life lessons, and what purpose each relationship has provided for me in my life thus far.
